Caroling

We sing the songs going from door to door.  They all look at us so nicely saying we're so cute.  I'm a little tired of it.  Nothing is cute about what has happened to me.  I've left my home, and haven't seen my mommy or daddy in weeks.  I don't know if I want to.  Everyone at the orphanage is so nice, but I'm missing something.  I can't say what it is but it's there.  Everyday I wake up and go downstairs and read.  No one knows I do it it's my secret.  I feel guilty like I'm stealing something.  This morning I didn't read.  We all decided to go caroling.  We've been going all morning I like the songs, but I know they'll be forgotten.  I know cause I don't remember anyone singing to me.  I round a corner, and look back.  I'm all alone.  I must have somehow taken a different turn than the others.  And I'm so new that they missed me.  I'm not scared though.  I've been alone before, but now I can go somewhere.  And even if something's missing I'll be fine.  I walk back around the bend and see a man looking at me he walks toward me so I stumble back.  He rubs his hands through my hair and calls me such a "sweet" boy.  Then he gives me a piece of chocolate.  I look at.  "I don't want it.  I have to get back to my friends."  His face is angry, but working to hide it.  I know that look.  It's the look the men who my mother goes off with have.  "It's okay I'll take you back." he says.  His eyes are hungry.  "Okay I will." I say.  He moves toward me to pick me up, but before he can I kick him between his legs he falls over in the alley, and I run away.  I'm not so dumb anymore.